Sunday, 10 July 2016

30 Day Challenge: What are you afraid of?

Well, lots of things.

But I only have one real phobia.

Bees. And there's no way I'm going to cheer this post up with pictures of them. I don't know exactly why I'm so afraid of them. I've never been stung by one and there's no incident related to them that could've made me fear them. In all the memories I have of them, I was already scared.

I remember my mom trying to make me get over my fear by walking me through our big yard, that was full of clovers (= full of bees), on a bright summer day. I must have been five or six. She held my hand so tighlty I couldn't get away so I closed my eyes and cried while being dragged through the yard. And probably refused to go outside at all for the rest of the day. That incident only made me more afraid of bees. I know my mom had good intentions but it really didn't work.

Another memory that increased my fear didn't even happen to me. I was playing basketball with my siblings in front of our house. (If you've read my ”20 questions” post you know that I don't like basketball very much but what wouldn't I do for my siblings?) My sister was wearing a bright yellow shirt and once she started sweating a lot, the bees were drawn to her. None of us saw any of them, she just suddenly cried, fell on her knees, and threw the shirt over her head. Her back, and the shirt, were full of bees (I don't remember how many) and she was in a lot of pain, but guess who was the one who refused to go outside for the rest of the day? Yep, not her.

Okay, I really really don't want to spend much more time reminiscing about bees, even though I've began to tolerate them a little bit better in the recent years. I don't really leave myself out of anything because of bees... but things like, walking a street where there are rose bushes on both sides, are still a hell for me. Hearing the bees all around me makes cold sweat run all over me and when one passes me by, I just freeze. And don't move untill I'm sure it's gone.

There was one time last month I did pretty well though. A bee sat on my shoulder when I was outside with a camp full of teens. I guess it doesn't happen too often since I can't remember the last time? Even less that it wanted to stay there. Okay, it was horrible, absolutely horrible, I could hear it stretch its wings beside my ear and every moment I was more and more sure I couldn't stay still a second longer, but, well, there's never anyhing else I can do, so I did. And evetually it went away. And after it was gone, I was kind of glad it had happened and I'd survived it. Not that I want it to happen again. Absolutely not.

Other than that, I'm just pretty much afraid on anything your common cautious, worried person is afraid of. Accidents, diseases, natural catastrophies, wars... you name it. It makes me uneasy to sit in a table with candles close to me. I only go on a motorcycle if my (ESTP 6) brother is driving. I always triple check keys, pin codes, e-mail addresses, numbers and stuff.

So things like that.

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